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“We’re fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance.”[my art blog dedicated to everyday muses]
It seems like every time I get into a debate with a white dude, they have some expectation that I have to be a perfect feminist in order to be a feminist. If I’m not perfect, they automatically assume that I am hypocrite.
This is so ridiculous and it pisses me off to no end.
I’m not talking about being racist, sexist, homophobic, etc. I’m talking about being a fan of Glee or like Victoria Secret or wearing make-up or something like that.
White dudes like to use those things against me as “proof” that I’m a hypocrite and thus everything I say is invalid.
Like, I am a multifaceted person. I can like shit I know is fucked up, and I can do fucked up shit, and I can make mistakes, and I can still be a feminist.
I’m not a perfect person and I live in a patriarchy, I am going to buy into it from time to time. That doesn’t mean what I have to say isn’t valid.
feminism isn’t some monolithic 10 commandments rule book. feminists disagree with each other about things and change their minds about things and make mistakes and grow and learn. it’s not like you’re gonna find any two feminists that think EXACTLY the same. i mean damn, do we really have to explain to people that we are multi-faceted people with layer upon layer of other moral convictions?
feminism is a lens through which we can analyze the world we live in and guide our decisions by, but that doesn’t necessarily mean our interpretations of the world are the same. and it doesn’t necessarily mean that we will ALWAYS sacrifice the benefits of social conformity in a patriarchal society for our principles. bottom line: the label doesn’t define the person, the person defines the label.
Yes, this commentary because the majority of arguments I get in with other feminists are because we disagree on some aspect of feminism, and the other person thinks I am wrong/a bad feminist because of it. THERE ARE SO MANY WAYS TO FEMINIST. There are radical feminists, liberal feminists, anarchist feminists, enviro-feminists, Muslim feminists, womenists, etc. We don’t all agree! And we don’t all have to agree! It’s okay that feminism isn’t monolithic, it’s one of the things that makes us great.
EXACTLY. Feminism is supposed to empower us (not just women btw, EVERYONE regardless of gender/orientation/identification) to make our own informed choices on how you want to live, and the dignity and respect to do so. Trying to force someone else to believe your “version” of feminism is just COMPLETELY MISSING THE POINT.